Learning to trust again, is it possible ?
The Tarot reading I have just given brought up a question along the lines of : “My boyfriend is still friends with his ex, he promised that he is not seeing her that often, but it still upsets me, is this going to finish our relationship”…
My response initially was that the first issue that needs to be addressed here is the low self esteem & jealousy that is evident just from the question !. There is no reason to believe that anything is going on , many people find it hard to accept that platonic relationships are possible between ex-lovers though in my experience not only is this the case but if the new partner is mature enough to accept the previous partner & develop a friendship, then this can be massively beneficial to all of those involved. After all, your partner may have spent a lot of time & had experiences with this person that helped form who they are today.
To investigate this scenario we performed a very quick fab 3 card Tarot past, present & future reading. In the position of past, no surprise to me, appeared the Three of Swords,
……… I tentatively asked if a painful break-up in the past had possibly impacted how this beautiful young woman reacted to relationships in the present. She looked surprised but conceded that this was indeed a possibility, her confidence & self esteem had definitely been shaken by this previous breakdown of a relationship & she did feel that she was less trusting than she was before. Though it seems obvious we talked about how releasing these outmoded beliefs about love to where they now belonged, the past, & approaching any new partnership with an open heart, expecting only the best, she could move her life forward in leaps & bounds, the past heartbreak could be allowed to melt away.
You Can’t Change Him, You Can Only Change You:
In the position of present we pulled our old friend the Devil,
… now when this card appears the questioner can be allowing damaging or limiting, sometimes irrational thoughts or behaviours to eat them up & have huge impact on where their life was headed. This lady laughed & said that yes she had been behaving out of sorts & her new partner had even gone as far as saying that she needed to look at the way her irrational jealousy over his previous relationship was affecting how their bond was developing. Again we talked about how recognising when these thoughts & actions appeared she could step back & see herself through the eyes of her new partner, accepting that if she could beat her ‘inner Devil’. By laughing at how irrational some of her thoughts had become she could stop wasting energy on trying to control or change her partner & could ultimately become much happier.
I explained that the Devil indicated the amount of energy & negative emotion that was being expended was having a detrimental effect on this young ladies life. She spent so much time obsessing on what had gone before, or what her partner may be up to now, that she had completely forgotten to allow herself to be happy & enjoy the most important time of her life, the present moment.
In the position of future we pulled The Queen of Cups,
.. interestingly this queen has the only closed cup in the suit, indicating that she has managed to put a lid on her emotions. She has accepted who she is and has been able to detach from her ego. She can see clearly how previous actions had prevented her from seeing her current situation in an accurate light & is now free from the petty jealousies & insecurities. The Queen in this situation obviously represented the seeker themselves & it was great to see that by just nipping her thought process in the bud, learning to trust again, this lady could possibly be able to lead a happy fulfilling life with her current partner. Though this is of course a snapshot of the situation, the message is clear. I am often faced with this sort of question in a reading & the answer is always the same. Until you learn to love & trust yourself as an individual, partnerships will always be more difficult to develop & sustain. In a relationship consultation with a psychic or Tarot reader you are always guaranteed an opinion slightly removed from your perspective & this can always be beneficial in showing you an alternative path.
I hope you manifest everything you desire, Lots of Love Paul x